‘A [love] poem’ By Becca

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I don’t want the love that I once gave because it was forced,
tampered and tainted by the love I was receiving.
I want the love that I have now.
It feels like the love I wish I’d given
were it not meddle with fear and insecurities.

New Levels, New Pressures.

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If you want to be a politician, imagine the hate you will have to filter through when you make a decision that does not please all sides. It’s virtually impossible to keep everyone happy, so hate and defamation are guaranteed. You’ll spend a lot of days in sadness and insanity if you don’t equip yourself now to be familiar with the pain of not being loved by all.

If you want to be the owner of a million dollar brand or business, imagine the envy and competition you will be faced with. If you are not strong enough to handle the pressure of being opposed on all sides, you’ll tank when you get there.

If you want to be a homemaker, that comes with its own pressures as well. If you aren’t fully secure in your identity and able to handle the pressure of a dark and fallen world, then you’ll question your abilities as a mother as your children grow up, and you’ll question the sanctity of your union every time your spouse leaves the house. It will drive you crazy.

You have to be ok with the testing that prepares us for the pressure of the next level. And you have to be able stand firm in your identity when trials, satan and the world try to convince you of something that isn’t true. Because those tests of your identity won’t cease. You know why? Because each new level requires a new level of strength.

The Cure to Procrastination

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Do the thing that stands in the way of the thing you’re avoiding. Do all of the things.

And if still you have no desire to do that thing. Find something you’re actually passionate about, and do that.

Believe it, or not.

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I don’t agree with the notion that you have to believe in yourself before anyone will believe in you. Sometimes it takes someone else to believe in you before you can actually believe it enough for everyone else to believe in you.

If you’re having trouble believing it’s possible to live out that dream, keep doing it. Someone will come along and give you that extra spark you need, and it’s a wrap from there.

Just keep doing it, whether you believe it yet or not.

New Wine Skins

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I hadn’t realized it until now, but I am pretty sure the parable of the wine skins is a parable about relationships.

“No one sews a new material on an old one.” (MEV)

When you’ve grown up a bit and become a new and better version of yourself, it is hard to continue to attach yourself to people who have not.

“Otherwise the new would tear, for the new piece does not match the old.”

The two are no longer the same. They do not go together. One has outgrown the other.

It goes on to say that the old ruins the new if the two come together and that the wine is wasted.

Put the new with the new. Go find or be found by your new match. They will have been doing the work too to become better for you.

And this last part– “And no, having drunk old wine, immediately desires new. For he says the old is better.”

No judgment necessary. We waste so much time trying to convince others why they are making the wrong choice and being hurt over the others’ inability to see this. But NO ONE craves new wine until they do, nor does anyone change over night. Show them grace and move forward. Find your “new.”The one that suits your NEW taste.

 

 

Here’s a song I have on repeat as I write this. Mesmerized by the prospect of this new love.

Who does it better?

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Today I attended a training on Social/Emotional learning. The 5 Social and Emotional needs of a child are:

Intimacy
Trust
Safety
Control
Independence

Gangs do a really good job of demonstrating these characteristics.

Most would say that churches do not.

It all starts by meeting the need.

An Update on my Coaching Journey

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Over the course of the last 15 months, I’ve had the fortune of creating a life that matches my goals and my passions.

Last April I left one dream job to pursue another dream of being a full-time professional coach. I was lucky enough to come across a company helping returning citizens regain stability. There, I get to teach participants financial principles that set them on track for a new quality of life.

My desire to become a financial coach in addition to my professional life coaching business stemmed from my experience going through the home buying process. I realized how little I knew despite having two degrees, a decent savings and investment portfolio and a job making nearly 6-figures. My fury with the “system” and the fact that none of the basic financial principles of home buying were taught in schools led me to develop a curriculum that I taught to school aged children using what I learned.

This passion project became the resume builder I needed to land the job I have now, where I am teaching adults facing employment barriers ranging from previous incarceration to drug recovery to extended homelessness how to become financially free, while they pursue careers in manufacturing.

I was hesitant to take on a “9 to 5” after stepping into full time entrepreneurship, but I decided to see it as an investment into my entrepreneurial endeavors rather than a deterrent.

Everyone knows the first few years of business ownership are challenging. This position gave me the financial security I needed to be able to step out with confidence. I didn’t have to worry about affording medical insurance or halting my retirement savings. I had the freedom to build a business that would provide both down the line.

Last week JARC Celebrated 4 years with our annual “Evening of Hope.” We had the pleasure of hearing from two alumni of the program who are now employed and experiencing the fruits of their new life, gainfully employed and crushing their goals.

I poured my heart into this job. I showed up for the trainees on days where I could barely stand to show up for myself. But I cared so deeply that they would have the chance at something better. Like I do now.

As hard as it is to close this chapter, it is time for me to take my business higher. In 2020, I will be taking another bold step. Stay tuned to be a part!

 

The Deceitful Heart

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The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately wicked; who can know it. This is what the Bible tells us in Jeremiah 17:9.But the world tells us, ‘follow your heart.’ ‘The heart wants what it wants.’

That it can cause us to take the Savior of the world, who died on the cross so that we could live and remove Him from the position of Lord over our lives, and replace Him with the person who causes us to feel rejected, neglected and continually disappoints us, makes it absolutely deceitful. The heart will lead us right into despair, worshipping the person who hasn’t an ounce of ability to love us compared to what God Himself can do.

Don’t follow your heart. It will mislead you.
Follow God, He will lead you to the one your heart is safe with.

What do you need to do right now to begin giving your heart back to God today?

Creating the Perfect Environment for Productivity

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Growing up, when you were in school, we had very little control of our learning environment. Teachers adjusted temperature settings and classroom fung shui according to their liking or to the status quo and we just had to adjust to it. Whether it was the ideal temperature or lighting for our specific needs was out of the question. Well as adults, particularly entrepreneurs of those with the autonomy to create their own work space at home, we get to dictate what the setting looks and feels like.

 

Heighten your productivity by using these tips to perfect your environment:

  1. Place a plant on your desk or nearby. It will improve air quality by removing pollutants and releasing fresh oxygen. Also, the color green improves memory and reduces stress.
  2. Adjust the temperature to your liking. Leaving it too hot or too cold will reduce your concentration.
  3. Wear comfortable clothing so they do not distract you from your work.
  4. Keep your desk clutter free. Only keep within reach what is absolutely necessary for the task and get the other stuff out of the way.
  5. Play classical music or your favorite playlist. Music raises dopamine levels that make you feel happier as you knock out your to-do list.
  6. Open the blinds. Access to natural light reduces eye strain, drowsiness and improves overall health.
  7. Put your phone on airplane mode for 15-30 minute intervals so that you have distraction free productivity for different spurts of time. If you can go longer, by all means, do so. If you need to pause and check for messages, give yourself a 5 minute limit before getting back into work mode.

Bonus: Setup your camera up to face you and hit record, then start working. I do this to hold myself accountable. It feels like someone is watching. Also, it occupies my phone so that I am not tempted to use it for other distractions. It gives me an accurate time stamp of how long I was working before hitting the stop button.

When reviewing the recording, pay attention to what catches your attention. Give yourself some comedic relief by laughing at the funny faces you make when you’re focused.

Depending on what kind of content you like to share, it might be something you post snippets of to motivate others on their productivity and to check out your perfectly curated working environment. 

Cheers to your productivity!